Friday, June 13, 2008
A Break-through... A tiny ray of hope....
An awesome office... good colleagues...I was all set to enjoy my sparkling new job...
It got off to a good start.. with a couple of events... However... it was not to be....as time went by... there were no events happening...
The management was obviously not amused...!!!
On top of that people I thought to be my friends .. did a 'volt e face' ... as if that was not enough...I heard people complaining about me on issues which were alien to me...
While I was grappling with these issues, I got to know that the person whom I respected & trusted the most... was actually behind the whole scheme of things...
Disillusioned & disheartened, I withdrew... putting up my defenses... almost like a tortoise... I stopped interacting with everyone... just went to office... rushed to meetings... made presentations & cost sheets...
Nothing seemed to be materializing... I was in utter despair...I had really started feeling tensed about the whole thing I lost sleep and was slowly getting into a state of depression...losing confidence in my ability...
I couldn't share this with my parents, because I knew it would worry them... & I couldn't tell my brother either ... the poor guy has enough on his plate anyway...
A colleague of mine who knew the whole story, realised what was happening and told me..." Dont withdraw into yourself this way... you will just push people away... thats a very negative approach.. you will suddenly become lonely..."
That was when I decided.. I was not in office to win a favourites contest... I had to prove my mettle....I was not a loser... I needed to fight back...
Thats exactly what I did... I kept working... calling & meeting prospective clients ...
In office... I slowly worked on interacting normally with my co-workers...Colleagues are colleagues not friends... (something new I learnt... coz in organizations I had worked earlier had yielded me a few very good friends...)
And then it gave... A sudden break-through... my sincere hard work paid off...
I just hope I am not saying this too soon.... but I think that I have atlast broken the jinx...!!!
I got My first work order after joining BIG MUSIC!!!
I think I should take this oppertunity to thank a few of my friends who pulled me out of the 'wallowing in self -pity mode' .... "Always remember,You are the best!!!" they said..." keep faith in yourself... all will be well..."
Thank you Dada... Thank you Mozz...God bless you...
I also remembered something my Ma, (who is an ardent fan of 'Sant Kabir') keeps telling me... "Sab din jaat na ek samana" meaning that there will always be ups & downs in life .. all days will not be the same... one should neither be too overconfident nor lose hope...
Ma... no matter how much we agree to disagree on certain issues... I am grateful to the Almighty for gifting me such an 'irritatingly wonderful' mother... (muuuuuuuuuaaaaah!)
As for Papa... he can never believe that his tomboyish daughter can ever... EVER lack confidence.... Love you Pa!!
Thursday, June 5, 2008
KOLKATA (Part 5) A Bandh Day, when it also rained...
I woke up with a start from the cozy coocoon of my bed, on a jarring clap of thunder... I looked towards the balcony... It was dark outside... confused I looked at the wall clock it was 7:30am...
WOW!!! Its gonna rain...!!! I smirked and flopped back on my bed... anyway I was not going to office... It was 5th June 08,the ruling party called a 'Bandh'...due to the price hike of petrol & diesel.My parents would hit the roof if I even tried to tell them that I would be going to office...!!!( not because they were supporting the bandh, but because it might not be very safe for me to venture out...)
The rain started... I could hear the pitter-patter of the rain drops as they struck against the window panes... "Shonda Matir Ghondho" the heady fragrance of moist earth, that comes with the first touch of the cool raindrops on the surface of the heated earth... the strong gusts of wind that blew swaying & lashing the branches of the trees surrounding our house... the forks of lightening, momentarity illuminating the darkened sky... followed by the loud peels of thunder... all added to the rainy charm...
It had stared raining really hard... My loveable labrador on noticing that I was awake... immediately sprung on me... licking my face... as if to say...' wake up lazy bones....' I hugged him & pushed him off me... I sat up and he gave me a wide mouthed grin... lolling out his pink tougue... his peace was shaken by a loud bang... he started... The Thunder played a spoilt-sport...I laughed... poor thing... he is generally not scared of loud noises, it had just caught him unawares (no, no... i am not being baised.. promise!!!)
I jumped out of bed... opened my windows... cold splashes of water hit my warm face... the cool rainy breeze... giving me goose-bumps... it was beautiful outside... the green leaves of the tree ouside my window seemed to to prancing in glee... their water drenched beauty captivated me... I rushed to get my little faithful 'soap-box'(i.e. my camera)
A bunch of 'Goloncho' flowers ouside the window was doing a merry rain-dance...the beads of water sticking to their unfurled velvety petals...I climbed the window sill to get this shot...
A moment frozen in time... I took this photo just as the drop of water at the tip of the leaf was about to fall...and now it never will...
Nowadays,we dont have a concept of having bird baths in the gardens... simply because land is do costly that people dont have space to create gardens... leave alone birdbaths!!!So when it rains birds try to make the most of it ...these pigeons, as I stood watching them slowly shifted their bodies, this way & that to get wet... then they lifted thir wings one by one trying to get the down feathers wet...(looked to me almost as if they were washing their arm pits!!! bahhhhhhhhhhh)
This ancient home grown (bel phool..) shrub, planted by my Nani (grandmother...)has always given us heady smelling flowers, its green leaves, with water dripping from its curled lamina,looks stark against the dreary, overcast sky...
My brother & I decided to go out for a walk in the afternoon... sheer curiocity made us venture out... I wanted to see how the Bandh & the rain had effected the residents of the City of Joy.... (hey... everyone loves a holiday... but I am kind of against the forced leaves that we have to take because of these, 'oh so prevailent BANDHS'!! It never has & never will solve any issue... its a complete wastage of a working day...surmounting to a huge loss of revenue for all businesses... I wonder why these polititians can't just put their heads together and come up with a solution to the challenge instead of these stupid activities... which leads to harrasment of the common man...and also gives a very negetive image to the people wanting to invest in this state....!!!)
No Rain or Bandh can stop women from gossipping....these two women armed with umbrellas, brave the rain to exchange a few words in the middle of the street...
The catterpillar-like leaves of this tree glistening with water
Glistening roads.. washed by the rain... very few people ventured out...
The air - borne MONKEY!!!! My Brother at what he does the best...
Thats me playing footsie with water...in a Flooded narrow lane near my house...
Absolutely deserted roads in my loacality ...
There's no stopping desperate lovers.. who are ready to brave the rain & the Bandh... in order to spend some quality time with eachother ... I just hope... that in the later stage of their lives they remain as eager to face the vagaries of life together...
The hand-pulled Rickshaws... wait on the side walk... the puller have been forced into taking a day off...
The Bandh effects the local market traders... another day wasted... lost revenue...who will compensate for this one wonder!!!
'Bhaari' - A person who delivers water to various houses in the locality... goes about quitely doing his work.... come rain or bandh... water supply falls under necessity ...
The Gariahat Junction, Rash behari Avenue... Normally...One of the densely populated, arterial roads of the Southern part of the City...devoide of any vehicle or people
The deserted crossroads..
Gariahat Market, wears a deserted look....riskshaw pullers, sit chatting...& sleeping.. a day off for them...
The desolate car park .. under the overbridge... which is otherwise always full & difficult to get a parking spot...Boys playing 'Gully Cricket'...a very common sight of the 'bandh-struck' city...
The deserted Gariahat flyover ... what a sight....!!!
The barren stretch of road Golpark to Gariahat, which is generally bursting at seams with traffic & pedestrians...
The 'istiriwala' - ironing man, doing his share of work... unfazed by the weather... the political or socio-economic turmoil. The official vehicle of the protectors of law & order in the city.... awaiting the rider...My brother & I walked back home... for my Mom's Rainy day special, delicious Lunch of 'Khichuri' & 'Ilish Maach bhaja'!!! Food was yummmmmmmmmmm......
It was a restful day at home... but not something I look forward to... taking a leave is different from being forced to take a leave....!!!!